Sunday, July 13, 2014


I'm not a huge fan of work meetings.  They always strike me as tedious and pointless.  After all, it's not like management is asking for your input.  It's not like there's going to be a lot of discussion involved, and so you need to gather everyone together to generate ideas and opinions.  Most work meetings simply consist of a manager telling you things.  This could be much more efficiently done by sending an email.

So, if I were the CEO of a company there wouldn't be a lot of meetings in my workplace.  However, if I did have to have a meeting I would incorporate a novel element - 

bean bag chairs.

You see, it is impossible to look authoritative or competent while sitting in a bean bag chair.  No matter how intelligent, articulate, and put together you are, if you sit in a bean bag chair you automatically look like a dim slacker preparing to watch Super Troopers or similar.  

You cannot be taken seriously while sitting in a bean bag chair.

I would have an enormous chair of power.  I would give some excuse about my back, to explain why I need said chair.  I would enter the room, take my seat and say "I'm so glad to see all of you enjoying these bean bag chairs.  I thought, 'Hey!  Why don't we try to make these meetings more comfortable and fun?'  How are you liking them?"

And they would all say they liked them fine, because that's what employees do.

And then I would present the situation to them, present my thoughts on what we should do, and ask for input.  Then when people tried to share their thoughts, I would sit back and watch while the other employees censored everything, because what worth could possibly be coming out of the mouth of someone sitting in a bean bag chair?  I wouldn't have to criticize anybody - the workers would do it for me.  And then I would restate my idea and everyone would love it, because I looke so competant and in charge.

It's a good way to preserve worker morale and make them feel valued and important, while not actually giving them any real power or input.

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