So I'm watching "New Moon". Yeah, I know I'm thirteen. But I want to discuss the character Jessica. In the book she's supposed to be boring and lame, but in this movie I actually like her and want to hear more from her.
Outside the movie theater she's all "I know zombie movies are supposed to be a criticism on mass consumerism, but like, get off your high horse. Some of us like to shop". I agree Jessica! And then she says "My cousin had leprosy, and it's not funny". Wait, your cousin had leprosy? I want to hear more about that! What happened? Was she in a leper colony? Did you ever visit her in the leper colony? And it's understandable that she gets annoyed with Bella. Who mopes and goes crazy for months over a teen breakup? And her reaction to "Bella's return" is totally funny. "Yay! Movie night with Bella...." - particularly funny since during their previous movie night Bella ditched her on the corner to ride a motorcycle with a stranger.
There needs to be some kind of Jessica movie spin-off where people act sane and talk about interesting things.